Operation X
by Halle Verrina
Summary: This is a journal that explains Hermione's feelings in 5th year, and she's dying to be popular. But, what would happen if she tried too hard? Death and danger can only occur in Hermione tries too hard...
1. Depression

A/N- Ok Hi!!!! This is the life of Hermione Granger in the way i think she might feel, depressed and lonely, but she doesn't show it. Please, no flames, because it's not that good and it's the worst plot in the world, but it'll get better. I think. lol. I know it's short, but it'll be longer next chapter._  
  
  
_Disclaimer- Obviously, I own absolutley nothing in this story except the dumb plot and my own opinion so why am I even putting a disclaimer on here? OH WELL. _  
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Hermione Lynn Granger   
Journal of the 5th year of Hogwarts  
  


8-25  
I'm going to Hogwarts, again. Oh joy. I hate it there. I am teased and ridiculed just like I was in Mayfield Elementary back here, at home. I had hoped it would all be different. Of course not. The only improvement is that I have two friends, but I am constantly wondering if they are only my friends out of pity. I bet so, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are almost always talking to themselves, never to me. My life is so boring, and I'm only a menace to society, Parvati and Lavendar say so. Well, that's what I think I hear. Honestly, people should just put me in a box, drop me onto the English Channel and watch me float away. Oh, I'm depressing myself again. I do this every time I write in this journal. I vow never to write in it until Hogwarts.  
  
~Hermione  
  
8-26  
Ok, so I lied.   
  
I never know why I sign my name after every journal entry. It's so pathetic, I mean, who ELSE could it be writing in Hermione's journal? Bob? Probably not. I don't even know a Bob. It's stupid, I'M stupid. I neeeeeeeeeeeed to talk to someone, and there are no people who care. The only thing that will listen to me is a poor, defenseless piece of paper that has to listen to every word I write, or it shall suffer the concequences of the paper shredder!   
  
Ahhh, I am doing my homework now, and I just spilled ink all over my favorite sweater. I can't get it out! Earlier, my cousins came over and started to tease me about being a witch. Bill (my oldest cousin who's 18) said he should tie me to the stake and burn me. He said he was kidding, but I don't know. He probably wants to get rid of me and my horrible life. I wish he would leave me alone! WORLD, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!  
  
~Hermione  
  
9-1  
Here I am now, lying on my four poster bed here at Hogwarts, where I should feel safe and happy, but I don't feel that way at all. Today was a nightmare. First, my father forgot to pick me up and drop me off at King's Cross (he often forgets about me like this). When I came in, I was on the other side of the station, so I had to use magic to get to platform 9 and 3/4 in time, although it's strictly forbidden. I've never breaken a rule like this in my life! But it was either follow rules or miss the train.   
  
Anyway, my trolley turned into a go-cart, and I was soon speeding down the halls at 30 miles per hour, steering it like a car. I flew through the wall between platforms 9 and 10, but the train was leaving! I had wait for the conductor to back up and pick me up, causing the train to be an hour behind schedule.   
  
I walked into the car that Harry and Ron were on when I got onto the train and said hi extremely brightly, but they didn't notice me while they were chomping down on their sweets from the cart. I tried to get their attention, but they never looked up. Am I really that forgettable? Would they notice if I were gone forever? Probably not.  
  
Later, we got to Hogwarts so late that me missed the feast. The meal is only good for a half hour after being eaten, so we were too late. The house elves (who are STILL slaves!) made us all sandwiches. Everyone was glaring at me when they thought of the roast turkey and mountains of sweets that they could have been eating, but because of me, they only had ham and beef sandwiches.   
  
Dumbledore pulled me away from the crowd during the dinner of subs for a bit to tell me that I was the newest Gryffindor 5th year prefect! I was so excited, and he told me the password. "London Jujubees" he told me. What an odd password! I took my new badge, pinned it onto my robes, and led the way to the Gryffindor towers.  
  
No one talked to me, not even Ron, who was really angry at me because he wasn't able to eat his favorite dishes at the feast. This brought my spirit down. He'll never like me. I'm the worst.  
  
So that was today's lovely adventure. I brought the entire school's dinner into the garbage, and now everyone hates me. Anyone have a box?  
  
~Hermione  
  
  
_9-5  
Harry's mad at me. So is Ron. I don't know why, but he seems to be ignoring me. He's always looking at the Hufflepuff table, and whenever I try to say something, he says, "whatever" and goes right on staring. Ron's always mad at me. It's just obvious.  
  
I've stopped eating again. Ron and Harry aren't even concerned at all! Why don't they notice that I'm in a horrible slump today? It's so obvious! The WORLD can see my pain, and they LAUGH at it. They laugh at me! It's the worst feeling in the world.   
  
~Hermione  
  
9-8  
I've gotten my first paper back. It was in Transfiguration. A perfect. The next highest was Harry's, a B-. Everyone looks at me envily. What did I do? The A was an accident. Maybe I should let my grades drop and just let everyone like me. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Become popular. That's what I need to do to make me happy!   
  
First thing's first. I need to make a list of what I need to do or improve on to become popular.   
  
_

Operation X  
nice hair (that'll be a miracle)  
low grades   
befriend Parvati and Lavendar  
buy new robes   
wear makeup  
break rules  
read Witch Weekly well, erm, weekly  
date someone popular  
  


Oh, God, that list is way to long to do. I bet myself I can pull it off. I'm only doing this for my happiness, so I won't end up alone and unwanted.  
  
Anyway, Operation X will start first thing tomorrow morning.  
  
~Hermione  
  



	2. Alone

9-9  
Being popular is not as easy as it looks. Today I took out the hair gel I got last year and make my hair as sleek and shiny as I could. Then I took out my new eye shadow and other stuff that I actually hate and put globs of it on. I braided my hair and put a huge butterfly clip on the bottom. I think I looked less than horrible today. I even got Ron's attention! Well, his mouth dropped faster than a sack of potatoes in shock, but it' s a start, don't you think? Parvati and Lavender noticed my new fashion change, and they approved. Proffessor Snape didn't.   
  
We had our first quiz in Potions today, making the shrinking potion. I did everything wrong on purpose. The potion turned bright green instead of gray, like it's supposed to. I got a 2 out of 10, the lowest in the class. Neville's was higher than mine, NEVILLE!!!! This is sooo degrading for me, why am I doing this? Oh, yes. Popularity. If popularity means making myself look like a clown and have Snape approve of my terrible grade, is it really for me?   
  
Well, even if it isn't it's the only thing I haven't tried to make myself happy.  
  
~Hermione  
  
9-14  
Our first visit to Hogsemeade today this year. I took all of my money and went shopping with Lavender and Parvati. First we went to buy new fashion robes.We're allowed to wear brightly colored robes on weekends now, it's Proffessor Dumbledore's new "experiment rule". I think he just wants to go against the ministry, for they disapproved, but, more power to the pupils! Anyway, Lavender bought a lovely one, can you guess the color? Yes, lavender. Soooo original, but she does have the brain of a gnat, so I shouldn't have expected better. Parvati picked out the most frightening pink one that I have ever seen. I thought she was joking, but when I laughed, she gave me a very disappointed stare, so I stopped. I saw the most ravishing gray robe, but the ditz twins thought it was so repulsive that they actually pulled it out of my hands and tried to rip it. When they did, they put it on the last rack way in the corner of the shop, and they picked out an average-looking blue one with an enormous price tag. I told them my budget, so they pulled out a hideous mocha-coloured robe with a considerable low price and actually switched the price tags! I was so shocked I wanted to walk out of there right then and there, but I was thinking about how lonely I feel all the time and how these two could stop my sadness.   
  
Anyway, I went right up to the register, positive I would be caught, but they just took the money from me and handed me the robe! I couldn't believe it! I got away with it! Now I feel so guilty for doing that, but I can't confess! If I payed the full price, I couldn't buy anything else! Besides, Lavender says it's like the shop was giving us a hidden discount, right? right?? RIGHT???????????  
  
Next on our list was makeup. More makeup! I see Lavender's makeup bag, it's bigger than my bookbag was when I went to muggle school! Parvati's must be just as big. They asked me if I had any makeup. I do, but I lied on how much I had. I have a container of eyeshadow and lipgloss. They think I have five eyeshadows, two colours of blush, every type of lipgloss and lipstick imaginable, and three types of mascara. They approved, obviously. We walked into the Makeup Shoppe. Can you believe Hogsmeade actually HAS a shop for this junk?!?! I didn't even know that! They pushed me down the lipstick section. The titles of the lipstick were so terribly corny: "Pink Passion," (2 sickles) and "Orange Rush" (3 sickles, 2 knuts). Lavender bought "Pink Passion", Parvati bought "Blue Beauty" (a whopping 8 sickles) and "Rainbow" (5 sickles). I wasn't going to buy anything, but they made my buy "Pink Glory" (1 sickle) and "Purple Sunset" (3 sickles). They also made me buy 2 blush types, pink and brown (5 sickles each), more lipglosses (6 sickles each) green, blue, pink, silver, brown, and yellow eyeshadows, four bottles of the magical hair gel, two packages of butterfly clips and two types of perfume! ("Man Attracter" and "Woman's Delight"... terrible, huh? I think they should be called "Disease" and "The Loo") *A/N: For those who don't know, the loo is the bathroom! My brother told me to put it in there* My bill ended up being 5 galleons, 10 sickles, and 16 knuts! Lavenders was two galleons higher, and Parvati's towered over Lavender's! I spent waaayy too much, and considering how my robe (the new price) was 6 galleons, I better get good use out of each and every stick of lipgloss!  
  
We stopped off at the newsstand to get Witch Weekly and Teen Witch, which all were about boys and clothes and makeup and jewelry and every stupid meaningless thing in a teenager's life. I hate trying to be popular! WHAT'S MY STUPID PROBLEM?! I'm not happy! Maybe I need to get used to it.  
  
After the newsstand, we bought 2 galleons worth of horrible jewelry, but I didn't honestly care. I looked across the path and saw Harry and Ron chewing on chocolate frogs, carrying their bags full of sweets and jokes to play on people. I wanted to run out of the store and go right over to them. Right then, they burst out laughing, I wanted to go over there even more, but Lavender pulled me over to show her new "beautiful" silver bracelet.   
  
I hate this popularity thing. It's just a horrible game, and someone always has to lose at games.   
  
Looks like that person will be me.  
  
~Hermione  
  
Later 9-14  
  
After I wrote my last entry, I went downstairs to eat dinner. I took my plate, and Lavender beckoned me over to sit by her. I looked over to see if Harry and Ron were doing the same. Nope, they weren't even looking at me, so naturally I went to sit by Lavender and Parvati.  
  
"I have to hand it to you, Hermione, but you really can be the cool one, unlike being your dorky self," Lavender complimented me. Well, at least I think it was a compliment.  
  
"Uh... thanks?" I replied.  
  
"Anyway, Hermione... hm... Hermione's suuch a childish name, don't you think, Lavender?" said Parvati.   
  
"Yes, you're quite right. Hm.. let's give you a nickname. Mione? no... Mylee! That's it!" Lavender answered.  
  
"Great!"  
  
"Uh, Lavender, I don't think changing my name is such a good..." I said, but they gave me this... "look" that told me to shut up. Now I'm stuck with the name Mylee. Ughh....  
  
Later, after dinner, Ron came straight up to me at the Gryffindor Common Room and yelled at me for not sitting with him and Harry at dinner. I told him I don't have to sit with him at dinner every night, do I? Of course, he stomps off to his dormatory, and I did the same. I brushed my teeth and put my pajamas on and headed straight to bed. I didn't fall asleep, though. It was 9:00PM when I came up, and it's 2:00AM now... and Lavender didn't come up yet... oh, wait! Here they come! They're talking about me. I'll pretend I'm asleep.  
  
...I heard what they were saying. They called me a "popular-in-training" and that Ron was a selfish prat who didn't know anything. How dare they talk about Ron like that! They have no right.. ugh....!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Those two Ditz Twins could learn respect, couldn't they.  
  
~Hermione Mylee 


	3. Some Mistakes corrected, Some worsened

A/N- lol, in case you were worried Hermione would do something stupid, she won't. I'm gonna have her do something so great that you'll see the glimmer of the great, proud Hermione in her darkest days. Well, soon... maybe or maybe not this chapter.... I gotta decide how long I want this chapter. :-)  
  
  
  
9-15  
It's morning now, and Lavender and Parvati already went down for breakfast. I don't want to eat. I'm to fat to eat. So I'm just looking at all of the new stuff I have. I spent all of my money on the trip to Hogsmeade last night. I mean, the money meant to last ALL YEAR!!!!! It's barley two weeks into the school year, and I spent more money now than I usually do in two years! What's happening to me? I think I'm going to return some stuff tonight, but this means to break the rules! Do I dare? Well, I guess I have to. Wait, Harry does have that map to Hogsmeade still, right? I better ask him later.  
  
~ Mylee (Who's really Hermione)   
  
Later, after the sneak to Hogsmeade  
  
I went down to Hogsmeade earlier, after dinner. I borrowed Harry's map, which took forever to follow. I left at 6 PM, and when I got there it was nearly 10. Luckily, all of the shops were still opened. I took back all of my makeup except for one of each item I got there, and I return all of my jewelry except one braclet, one necklace, one package of butterfly clips, one anklet (which I think are very silly, but if Lavender and Parvati ever found out about this trip... oh dear). I returned the blue robe and exchanged it for the cheapest they had that was similar to the one they showed me. I was so bushed that I went to go get a bottle of butterbeer in the Three Broomsticks, but I couldn't because Hagrid, Proffessor Snape, and Proffessor Dumbledore were all in there! I think Hagrid spotted me. If only I had Harry's invisibility cloak... Anyway, by the time I got back into the Gryffindor Common Room it was past 4 AM, and dawn was peaking on the horizon. Lavender and Parvati were asleep when I got in there. It might have been late, but I was lucky that I was able to do all that without being caught. I got back 6 galleons! I hope never to spend that much ever again. Now I have to pretend I still HAVE all of that stuff..  
  
~Mylee  
  
9-16  
I was so bushed from last night, or, well, this morning, that I accidentally slept through breakfast. Not that I was going to eat anything. I put on my robes and opened the makeup. I had saved my bright blue eyeshadow, and I put it all over my eyes. How do you do all of this stuff, anyway? I put the blush in a huge circle on my cheeks, then I put on the lipstick and sprayed on the perfume. I couldn't smell it at first, so I put on 6 more sprays. Then I used the magic hair gel. When I walked into Charms later, everyone looked shocked. Harry and Ron pretended to pass out from the perfume. Wait, were they pretending? Ah, nevermind. Everyone else started to laugh. I felt so humiliated, that I ran out of the room and straight to the bathrooms. I tried so hard to wash off all of the makeup, but none of it came off. I ended up doing a scourging charm to get rid of it. Now my head looks like a huge red lollipop with hair. I don't think it will go away for a long time.  
  
~Mylee/Hermione  
  
9-26   
Guess what. It didn't. My head turned so red that I had to go to the hospital wing for three days! Harry and Ron visited me each day, and Ron gave me a red rose all three times. I thought he was being really nice and he flattered me until he started laughing and my lollipop head. When he left, Harry stayed behind a minute and told me that Ron didn't mean it when he laughed, but I don't know. Honestly, I shouldn't be worrying about boys right now! Oh yes, Lavender and Parvati didn't visit me once. Their excuse was, "Ohh, we were soo busy with homework." suuure..... They didn't want to see my lame excuse for a head, that's all.  
  
Another thing I shouldn't be worrying about is my grades. I should really do good. The day I got back from the hospital wing I took the History of Magic Test. a 47%. Terrible, but this time Neville got lower than me. Why should I care if someone gets lower than me???? Do I really need to do better than people to feel good about myself? I guess yes, because I do it all of the time.   
  
I looked at all of my grades in all of my classes. They are all either B- or lower. I have an F in transfiguration. Professor McGonnagall wanted to see me after class. She said she noticed how Lavender and Parvati were effecting me, and not in a good way. Her eyes glanced up to my caked-on makeup on my face that Lavender put on. She's been doing it for the last couple of days. I told Proffessor McGonnagall that I'm going to bring my grades up. I will, too. Is popularity really so important to me that I should have my grades suffer? Of course not. I'm not going to. I guess I won't tell Lavender or Parvati this, though, will I?  
  
~Hermione as Mylee  
  
10-3  
My grades are fairing better. I have As in all of my classes, and the ditz twins are none the wiser.  
  
I also got so mad today at Lavender and Parvati that I was ready to tear off their heads. They kept on pressuring me to do a prank on Ron. Of course I said no, but they did it anyway. Well, when he walked into the common room they magically dumped cold chicken broth on him. The worst part was that he turned into a chicken when it hit him! He looked so embarressed, I felt sooooo bad for him. He looked at me with those hurt eyes like it was MY idea to do that! I wanted to run after him to tell him I refused to do it, but he ran off too fast.   
  
I turned towards Lavender and Parvati and told them some.. .well.. not nice things that I was advised not to repeat, and then I went to bed. I don't know whether or not the ditz twins'll like me anymore, but right now, I don't care.   
  
~Girl formerly known as Mylee and also formerly known and Hermione  
  
  
  
A/N I think this was too short, but i don't feel like writing anymore. lol. Besides, i get to open a present tonight! lol. Anyway, on your reviews, tell me wether or not you want the ditz twins to take back Hermione not, I don't know which way to go. Thanks! Merry Christmas! :-) 


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